self-loading baggage

I’m officially marrying up the start of the D.C. Cherry Blossom Festival (March 31st) to the start of the tourist season. I’m not the first to come to this conclusion, I won’t be the last, but it must be said. The combination of spring break families with 2.5 children and the outer Virginia families that make their annual Metro ride in from the sticks can be too much for anyone with a commuter life. The festival attracts a lot of the locals to the big, sprawling, kind of scary city. Here are some tips to parse out the two groups.

Ohio tourists (accepting the award for everyone from beyond Virginia): Mom, Dad, 2.5 kids. They don’t dress mid-Atlantic and they apparently take their luggage with them everywhere they go. You see lots of Ohio St. Buckeye hats and shirts, khaki capri pants, white shorts, and well-groomed children. The entire family enjoys the wall-mounted Metro map! Pay particular attention when noting the kids: any self-respecting goth or punk rocker is not going to D.C. with the family to learn about history and stuff. The black-clad minion will figure out a way to stay home for the week and live with a friend, or better yet, how to have a keg party in the family split-level home.

Virginia/local tourist: The goth/punk kid presence is the first sign. Clearly, this family has driven from Richmond to the Vienna Metro and is riding into D.C. as a nuclear family. Angst riddled kids have a hard time convincing the parents that they can’t spend even one day with the family. I also don’t think many Ohio tourist stay in hotels out in the suburbs, which means most families on the Metro in Virginia I classify as locals. They don’t have the roller bags, there’s no look of real fear, and only the kids usually check the Metro map on the wall. The adults no doubt worked in the city at some point or another; they don’t find the mass transit map all that interesting.

I will be acting the tourist this weekend while Laurel and I visit some of the spots we missed in January, primarily the Washington Monument and Jefferson Memorial. How do I reconcile myself to this fate? Well, I’ll have my messenger bag (sure sign of the commuter), we’ll both have SmartTrip cards (the call of the commuter), and I always give Laurel the city brief on day one (teachings of the commuter). By the time we ride into the depths of Ballston Metro we’ll look tough, we’ll ignore the lost (unless they ask for help…we are actually nice), and we’ll push people out of the way if we have too. Questions?

Thought not.

T.