sixteen tons

The boys' economic model has undergone a change that follows closely on the heels of the failed first attempt at a fledging system. It doesn't appear to be any type of a collapse due to protest, or a march on the capitalists, as much as a house of cards falling like the Italian government swooning on a seaonal calender. The original gPts. system fell into disrepair and disuse simply because it wasn't functioning on any level: no income, no expenses, no quarterly balance sheet. In fact, it had become so passe that goods and services were secretly being traded on a black market that I wasn't fully aware of so I'd removed/erased the gPts. balance sheet from the dry erase board just this weekend; it was old and tattered and needed to be removed from circulation. I'll dubbed myself 'The Mint': I can make and destroy points but the running of the model is of no interest to me. When I got home yesterday, and the boys were back from their visit with their father, Gabe asked me what had happened to the gPts. ledger, had I erased it? I repeated my whole Italian government dissertation which he found exceedingly boring since all he really wanted to do was explain the new currency. He asked me if I could please not erase the "B"s that they had added to the bottom of each square on the dry erase calender. These now represent the only remaining currency in the new market: one B on each day to represent Henry playing Bionicles with Gabe. If I had to come up with a representative description for the new plan I'd say it was a cross between a company store and the old Eastern Bloc: there's no actual currency and there's only one thing to purchase. It takes me back to the days of the East Berlin storefront that had a somewhat limited use...the vignette is funnier when you use the same heavy Slavic accent that I was hearing in my head:

(scene opens in a very dusty, vacant communist bloc store in East Berlin)
East German: "Excuse me Sir. I'd like a birthday gift for my daughter."
Ivan the Clerk: "I will play Bionicles with her."
EG: "Hmm. I don't know that she much likes Bionicles."
Ivan: "We have Bionicles."
EG: "Well, okay then. I also need gift for my great aunt who fought in the war."
Ivan: "I will play Bionicles with her."
EG: "Don't you have anything else? She's in her eighties you know."
Ivan: "We have Bionicles."
EG: "Well. I guess I can't take this 'money' anywhere else. Maybe I'll earn some more next year."
Ivan: "There is no more money. There is Bionicles."

From Gabe's overview description I think Henry is free to erase the B on a given day, maybe even in advance, if he deems Gabe warrants loss of 'currency'. I don't think Gabe can actually earn any Bs since today through the end of the month is already paid in advance: he's on salary, there is no overtime. He's got was he's got, he can't get no more, he can only trade a B for the allotted service, and he can lose them at the discretion of the company store. This won't go over well. Another day older and deeper in debt.

The Eleven headed to Maryland with a dish of enchiladas and pot of black bean soup Saturday night. Only one wrong turn enroute to the hostess' townhouse in Gaithersburg, MD. Sue has a lot of space for a reasonable amount of money and I was tempted to see if we could move that townhouse to Arlington and keep the price the same - maybe a big ol' tow truck would do the trick. We had some dinner and drinks before we decided to head back to our house (in caravan), drop off our car, and carpool in Sue's to the bar in D.C. Seemed the easiest execution since we could Metro home and she could pop up north to her house afterward. Our impeccable timing brought us upon the bar's block just as the Wizards game was disgorging from the Verizon Center just across the street from the bar...Hibachi! This might not seem like a huge problem if you're not all NBA like us, but the D.C. police for some reason block off a four or five block area around the area and we kept getting shuttled down some random and crappy one-way street; oh wait...that could be describing the entire D.C. traffic pattern. We finally I-spied a curbside space a few blocks from our destination, the RNR club* on 6th St. NW. I don't know if I'm too old to judge clubs/bars anymore, at least this kind of bar, but that certainly won't stop me. It was a decent enough place overall: live band playing on the first level (we thought it would be an Irish band but these guys turned out to be the openers), DJs on the second and third floors. The bar staff was horrible - the only one who had any gumption was fully lit by 10pm, and uselessly sobbing to herself after that, after doing shooters with the crowd and dancing on her bar. The 'staff' (of one) at the third floor bar was fully challenged to fill an order every five minutes. I'm going to venture a guess and say that the 'pretty' and 'stacked' boxes were checked on her application for employment. We hung around the third foor for a while so we could listen to the combination of 80s music and Justin Timberlake re-mixes, watch the crowd dance, and take in the "skirt". Our later return to the first floor (sans the drunk and crying bartender) was much better than the opening tour. The Irish band set-up and the evening got progressively better once they started bashing, fiddling, and fluting aways. Funny that the place was much emptier by 11:30 when they started with the Irish stuff...I guess all the cool folks went somewhere else.

Patrons? I like people watching, I used to like dancing more than I do now, but the two things that stood out are these:

1. Too many people apparently go to jam-packed bars on weekends, especially on a holidays it seems, and pay with credit cards. Here are my recommendations: cash. money. GO TO THE ATM. The bartender who's attempting to sling drinks rapidly does not need to deal with you flashing your free-in-the-mail Gold Card whilst paying for $20 worth of drinks. Not only do they surely hate you...I hate you because I'm waiting for you put your John Hancock on a slip of paper to cover the three Miller Lites and one Bud Lite that you and your 'buds' are drinking before I can get my order in. A-T-M.

2. I don't think much of people that drink any combination of Red Bull and Jagermeister. I can't believe Jagermeister is still made. Awful.

We Metro'd home after Sue dropped us near Metro Center in D.C. and finally tumbled into bed about 1am. What am I doing out at 1am? My question exactly.

Everything went swimmingly.

T.

* I can't vouch for the second review and the "picking up of girls" bit. I was already with two girls...and one of them was a sure thing.