a what?

It’s yet another entry in the grand archives of online commentary from BBC bloggers covering sport; this one credited to Tom Fordyce. It's from the ongoing second set of the ladies semi-final between Venus Williams and Elena Dementieva (read from the bottom. The top is the most current with the score in this set):

Dementieva 3-4 Venus
Demen's nowhere near one. She's now screaming on almost every point. On reflection, it's more Hattie Jacques having rump pinched by Sid James than the Victorian lady scenario described earlier.

Dementieva 3-3 Venus
Demen's best hold of the match - to 30, which for her is as untroubled as it's been. Now for a pop at a break...

Dementieva 2-3 Venus
Tiniest hint of a change in momentum; Elena seems to have realised that she'll have to go for her big guns if she's to have a chance, and a gambler's forehand sends Venus scrambling fruitlessly. She has a roll of the dice at deuce but puts her chips on a forehand wide and sees the ball drop the wrong side of the line. Venus holds, and Demen produces a drawn-out scream of the sort you might expect from a Victorian lady shocked in her boudoir by a rakish manservant.

Brilliant.

t.