oi!

“What fresh calamity is this? Bell goes second ball for a dismal quacker, missing a pacy in-dipper and being trapped bang in front. England 's lead is just four runs - this could all be over this evening.”

That, my friends, is a commentary from the BBC on today’s action (day four of five) at the second nPower cricket test at Trent Bridge, England. For those not following the summer tests, the first ended in a draw as weather and bad light denied an England victory. The Indian bowlers are dominating this test and the England batters are struggling. With more than a full day to go the Indians should wrap this up in short order. A quick, Americanized, Chris Berman, translation of the above:

“Unbelievable, isn’t it? Ian ‘Alexander Graham’ Bell , taking only his second pitch in the box, is OUT for no runs! Zaheer ‘Wrath of’ Khan rings him up with a fireball that broke in on Bell as he stepped in front of the plate for a mighty swing. BANG! The ball unbelievably hits him, and the zebra sends him packing. Tea may be done but India is still steaming ahead. England leads by a hair but they’ll need oven mitts to manage the Indians…they are boiling hot! Warm up the sheets for England …this’ll be over in time for a short story before bed.”

Of course, flowing cricket description is a thing of beauty. Go ahead and practice the former, skip that latter.

Yours googly,

T